Paint jokes

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

r u a toaster? cuz i wanna take a bath wit u r u a knife? cuz u make me wanna kms r u a painting? cuz i hang u r u the flu? cuz u make me wanna hurl r u a newspaper? cuz u have new problems everyday r u the ground? cuz im six feet deep in u ;)

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


Q, Why did the elephant paint his toenails red? A, To hide up cherry trees. Q, What’s the loudest noise in the jungle? A, Giraffes eating cherries.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house? in Washington D.C.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

whats the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? the freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out what doe Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? they both used there brains to paint the the walls

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how many you throw.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


how do you confuse a blonde? paint yourself green and throw forks at her

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

What does it take to paint a wall red? Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins: Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still. Devil: Did she just twitch? A: No. She didn’t twitch. D: I think I saw her

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?” The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.” A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. “You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a Porch, it’s a Ferrari.”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them. your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using microsoft paint

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

My Xbox has been acting up lately… So I painted it black to make it run faster

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2025