Paint jokes

How do you paint a wall red? You shoot a baby with a .50 cal

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Two kids walked into a bar, they were covered with blood. the bartender asked what happened. The youngest said “Well, we we’re trying to paint our basement but we threw the babies too hard”.

-2 -1 0 +1 +2


My young son saw trump on TV he asked “Why is the man on TV painted orange?” I replied “Son when Russia pays that much for equipment, They don’t want it to rust”

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

Why did the painting go to jail? Because it was framed!

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

what do Bob Ross’s painting and the orphanage have in common. They’re both filled with happy little accidents…

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

whats the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? the freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out what doe Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? they both used there brains to paint the the walls

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2


-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them. your hairline looks like someone tried to erase it using microsoft paint

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins: Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still. Devil: Did she just twitch? A: No. She didn’t twitch. D: I think I saw her

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *
-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *

A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, ‘This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for ?300 as long as you can say it in three words.’ The guy replies, ‘Hey, why not?’ He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays ? 300 on the bar, and says slowly. ‘Paint…my….house.’

-2 -1 0 +1 +2
* * *


© àíåêäîòîâ.net, 1997 - 2025