What’s the opposite of an exorcism? It’s when Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child.
Whats the difference between a Silver Medal and a Priest? They both came in a little behind.
Roses are red, don’t touch the toys, these are what the priests use to lure in the boys.
What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer? A Father in law
Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.
What do priest and doctors have in common? They both do physicals on kids.
What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest? Father les.
What do a girl and a bar have in common? A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!
They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible: Thou shalt not f… altar boys
The worst part about church is that you’re constantly switching between sitting, standing and kneeling; I mean, why can’t the priest just pick a position and f**k me already! A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, “Any last requests? ” “Yes,” replied the murderer, “Will you please hold my hand?”
Johnny is walking along and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, “Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?” The priest says, “Because I’m a father.” Johnny says, “Yeah? Well, my old man’s got three kids and he don’t wear his collar backwards.” The priest says “You don’t understand, son. I have thousands of children. ” Johnny says, “You should wear your f@ckin’ trousers backwards.”
Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.
What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common - They both like fairies sitting on them.
Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids? To tie his kangaroo down sport
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