I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.
RIP boiling water. You will be mist. There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.
Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!
Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.
I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll
A prisoner was told how he’ll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me. It was such a nice jester! :D
I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. so I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle.
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. what a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
I’d tell a sodium and hydrogen pun, but NaH
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