Puns jokes

I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.” “Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”

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I told the doctor I didn’t want a brain surgery. But he changed my mind.

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a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace

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I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.

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Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.

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Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!

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I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

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I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win. No pun in ten did

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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.

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What do you call it when a midget waves at you? A microwave

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? – Because they lactose.

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I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. so I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle.

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My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high…

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Why did the library book go to the doctor? – It needed to be checked out.

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Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.

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