What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday
I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.
how does a crazy person get to the woods? He takes the psychopath.
An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?” – The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.
I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk
Why did the gym close down? – It just didn’t work out.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, “I can’t believe I blew forty bucks in there.”
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.
Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel? It is ground breaking!
I Googled “How to start a Wildfire”. I got 48,500 matches.
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