I bought a wooden whistle. But it wooden whistle. so I bought a steel whistle. But it steel wooden whistle. So I bought a lead whistle. But it steel wooden lead me whistle.
Why did the blind man fall down the well? He just couldn’t see that well.
My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”
Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me. It was such a nice jester! :D
What do you call a Russian tree? Dimitree
I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized, it was a waist of time!
Will glass coffins be a success? – Remains to be seen.
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. what a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
I was addicted to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.” “Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”
Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!
Some people think prison is one word…but to robbers it’s a whole sentence
Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? Because there were too many knights.
What do you call an alligator with a vest? An investigator.
RUS | ENG
