Puns jokes

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.

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I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday

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I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.

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Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak

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Dont trust atoms they make up everything.

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What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs.

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My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. what a stupid thing to Fallout 4.

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I’m the champion of this site I fight with the ten rings and ten fists of the legendary buddah.

Now for my joke… Why does Peter pan always fly? Because he neverlands…

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I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win.

No pun in ten did

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Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

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I went for a job interview today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who is responsible.”

“Well, I’m your man.” I replied, “In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible.”

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Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.

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What do you call an alligator with a vest?

An investigator.

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An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”

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You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll

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