My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles’ elbow.
A prisoner was told how he’ll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.
Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
How does Moses prepare his tea? – Hebrews it.
a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Why do bees have sticky hair They always use honeycombs
“Doctor, there’s a patient on line 1 that says he’s invisible” “Well, tell him I can’t see him right now.”
Where did the cat go when it lost it’s tail? – To the retail store!
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.
When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’
There was a kidnapping at school… Don?t worry, he woke up.
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