Puns jokes

I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized, it was a waist of time!

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If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?

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I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.

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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.

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My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high…

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Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? Because there were too many knights.

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Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?” – The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

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I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. – I lost my case.

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I have a fear of speed bumps But i am slowly getting over it

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When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’

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Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.

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What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.

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How do trees get online? – They just log in.

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I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.

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I accidentally drank a little food colouring last night. I ended up dying inside.

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