How does a fish always know how much they weigh? – Because they have their own scales.
Why did the library book go to the doctor? – It needed to be checked out.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
Dont trust atoms they make up everything.
how does a crazy person get to the woods? He takes the psychopath.
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? – Well, the flag is a big plus.
An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”
Will glass coffins be a success? – Remains to be seen.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any.
What do you call an alligator with a vest? An investigator.
When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’
Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me. It was such a nice jester! :D
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