Puns jokes

What does a spy do when he’s cold? He goes under cover.

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There was a kidnapping at school… Don?t worry, he woke up.

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Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.

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An atom loses an electron… It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”

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What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel? It is ground breaking!

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So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? – Because they lactose.

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Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent. There’s a movie about constipation. It hasn’t come out yet.

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I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there.

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I was addicted to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around.

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If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?

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a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace

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What do you call a Russian tree? Dimitree

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Dont trust atoms they make up everything.

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I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday

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