Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? – It was a grave mistake.
Communist jokes aren’t funny unless everyone gets them.
Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.
Do you know how to make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!
I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday
Why did the library book go to the doctor? – It needed to be checked out.
What do you call it when a midget waves at you? A microwave
I Googled “How to start a Wildfire”. I got 48,500 matches.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. – A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Why do bees have sticky hair They always use honeycombs
Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? – Because they lactose.
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? – Because they have their own scales.
I would tell you a construction pun, but I’m still working on it
RUS | ENG
