Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
Why did the picture go to jail? Cause it was framed!
You know why I don’t buy Velcro items anymore? They are a total rip off.
little johnny was siting in class one day and the teacher was talking about life and ask him " little johnny how do you want your wife to be like" and he answered " like the moon" and the teacher said " that’s such a beautiful answer because it calm and peaceful " and little htm title=' appears at night and disappears in the morning'>johnny said " no because it appears at night and disappears in the morning"
Why doesn’t the Sun go to college? – Because it has a million degrees.
a mexican was doing a magic trick he said “uno, dos,” then disappeared without a trace
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
What do you call a Russian tree? Dimitree
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line. How do you cut ancient Rome in half? With a pair of Caesars.
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.
Why do bees have sticky hair They always use honeycombs
My boss yelled at me the other day, “You’ve got to be the worst train driver in history. How many trains did you derail last year? ” I said, “Can’t say for sure, it’s so hard to keep track!”
I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized, it was a waist of time!
RUS | ENG