What do you call a Russian tree? Dimitree
My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high…
Two artists had an art contest. – It ended in a draw.
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Why did the gym close down? – It just didn’t work out.
My friend gave me sugar for my birthday, she thought it was cheap I thought it was pretty sweet
Do you want to hear a money joke? Never mind it makes no cents
I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic?
Q: What did the drunk emo say to the bartender? A: Nothing! He was hung over. My sister thinks shes so smart, shes said onions are the only food that makes you cry So I threw a coconut at her
So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world
A prisoner was told how he’ll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, “I can’t believe I blew forty bucks in there.”
New Teslas don’t come with a new car smell they come with an Elon Musk
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