I don’t drink, don’t swear, don’t smoke, shit, I left my cigerates at the f@cking bar! (Andrew Dice Clay.)
Yo mama so stupid she though seaweed was something fish smoke
Little Johnny walks in on his grandfather smoking a cigar. “May I smoke a cigar?” Asks Johnny. The grandpa replies “Well, does your dick touch your asshole?” Johnny replied “No.” and left the room. The next day Johnny sees his Grandpa getting into a car. “Can I drive the car?” Asks Johnny. “Does your dick touch your asshole?” “No.” The day after that, Granpa sees Johnny about to eat a cookie. “Johnny, may I have some of your cookie?” Asked the grandpa. “Does your dick touch your asshole, grandpa?” “Yep.” “Then go f@ck yourself, this is my cookie.”
I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm she said “ is it because I warned him when hottness came” I said “ no, you don’t shut up
THIS IS A RYTHME jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said u know u wanna jill said yes as he grabbed her dress and they had a little fun jill forgot her pills so now they have a son
Damn girl, are you a smoke detector? Because you’re super annoying and won’t shut up.
When midgets smoke weed do they get high or do they get medium
When a miget smokes weed do they get high or medium
Why did the guy get the hose Because the girl was smoking hot
What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed? A baked potato.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched Jill’s thigh and said “I know you wanna.” Jill said yes, took off her dress and then they had some fun. But silly Jill forgot her pills and now they have a son.
My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating. ” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”
VOTING QUARTERFINAL 3: LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. ?????? DISLIKE: When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering but you walk toward his gun; “I will finish what you started.” Vote for the better joke
what do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed? a baked potato
A bear and a rabbit are at a bar getting high smoking weed talking about nothing but lies and straight up garbage. and then the bear starts to drink too much damn liquor gets drunk and ask the rabbit can i have one more scotch pretty please? And the rabbit says hell to the naw I’m not about to carry your drunk ass home with me and smell your breath.
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