Straight jokes

In Africa, it doesn’t matter if you’re gay, straight or bisexual. At the end of the day, it’s night.

========================= (pre-election 2016) Trump Hating Comedian at seedy East L.A. comedy club - "Hey how "bout that Donald Trump chump… what the f@ck up with that dude, man ? “Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!” (< leap week, muthafukas !) . . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit

How do you find out if your kid is gay? Lock him in a closet and if he comes out his gay if not his dead straight.

Me and my friend got in to a fight I look straight forward and said look me in my eyes

What’s one thing that gay person scared at? A gay guy that’s straight!

why does a straight guy act gay? cause he wants to feel wanted and wants to be bffs with the hotest girls

POV: You liked this joke because your straight

A police officer writes a ticket for a car not being parked correctly. The driver asks why. When he realizes he is parked poorly, he responds “Oh. I’m terribly sorry. You see, I’m so gay I can’t even park straight.”

you know what me and my spine both have in common we are both not straight

why can’t lgbtq+ members be straight cause they are lgbtq they are loser

Pinocchio goes to the doctor for a checkup. When he gets there the doctor asks him “Do you have cancer?” Pinocchio replies, “That was very straight up, but, no I’m pretty sure I don’t have cancer.” After saying this, his nose grew.

What’s the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

isn’t it strange that the LGTBQ flag only has straight lines?

Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was and she replied with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless…”. Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed. The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is and he answered with “Oh what’s the point. Life is meaningless…” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!” As Sam arrived at the counselors office she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.

Straights are ALWAYS asking LGBTQ+ people why they have such GOOD FASHION SENSE, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing,honey ;)