Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 13 September

Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

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Family jokes
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What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

Whats the difference between Stephen Hawking an a walkie talkie? Stephen cant walkie an stephen cant talkie

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What’s the difference?

What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is weirdest thing to say. Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops! Weirdest thing to say: “Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?” “The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien.” (weird). Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt(really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!

All these sea monster jokes are just Kraken me up.

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Sea jokes
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What did the doctor say to the chinese patient? Sum ting wong

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Doctors jokes
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Why do people think about handsome boys at night? Because their dreamy!

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Dream jokes
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YOUR MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE ASKED FOR A WATER BED THEY PUT A BLAKET OVER THE PACIFIC OCEAN

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Fat jokes

What’s the difference between princess Dianna and Thomas the tank engine Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel

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What’s the difference?
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Why did stephen hawkins die

He lost internet connections

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Lost jokes
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What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Fat, you get Fat.

What? were you expecting a pi joke?

Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, the earth falls out of the Solar System.

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Fat jokes
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Why did the orphan wait in line? To see their parents next

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Waiting jokes
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I hit a ball with a bat it was called animal abuse

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Hit jokes

Me:Have you seen a mr.weewoo Most people:no Me: he drives the ambulance down stairs

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Stairs jokes
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They say Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn’t cry

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Dark Humor
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Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.

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Nut jokes
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My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a pdf file!!

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Computer jokes
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This isnt an orphan joke but. I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.

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Job jokes

Woman: Doctor, where are we going? Doctor: To the morgue. Woman: I’m not dead yet, doctor. Doctor: We’re not at morgue yet, either

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Woman jokes
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

“Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

Watson replied, “I see millions of stars.”

“What does that tell you?”

Watson pondered for a minute.

“Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.” “Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.” “Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.” “Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant.” “Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.” “What does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: “Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!”

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Puns jokes
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I’ll never forget my aunt’s last words before she died “can you stop shaking the latter please”

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Dark Humor
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When the chair was invented, the inventor’s friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: ‘You might want to sit down for this.’

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Puns jokes
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How can toilet paper decorate your house

Shit sticks everywhere

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Stick jokes
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