Ñàìîå ïîïóëÿðíîå 28 January

Do one day i was sitting on my couch watching youtube when i heard a knock on the door. i opened the door and to my surprise it was my dad. i haven’t seen him in 16 years, so i let him in. i noticed he had a gallon of milk in his hand and he went to the kitchen and put the milk in the fridge. then he walked towards me and said “Oh no! i forgot the cereal! ” then he walked out the door and drove away. i never saw him again

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Milk jokes
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Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make.

Then they call me ugly and poor

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Poor jokes

What’s the difference between Bird flu and swine flu? – For one you get tweetment, for the other you get oinkment.

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Doctors jokes
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What does an cannibal call people in water

Sea food

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Sea jokes
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%%Dad: “Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?”

Son: “Nah, mostly men.”

Dad: “Do you think you’d be comfortable telling that to a judge in court…”

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Family jokes
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Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son, Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day.??

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Dark Humor

R u a toaster? cuz i wanna take a bath wit u r u a knife? cuz u make me wanna kms r u a painting? cuz i hang u r u the flu? cuz u make me wanna hurl r u a newspaper? cuz u have new problems everyday r u the ground? cuz im six feet deep in u ;)

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Paint jokes
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What is different about priests and acne.

Acne waits until your 13 to cum on your face

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Waiting jokes
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Do you like Wendy’s? Yeah Wendy’s nuts finna go in your mouth

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Nut jokes
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Yo mama, so ugly she’s the reason why Batman fights crime at night.

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Fight jokes
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What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud

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Dark Humor

What’s a Mexican’s favorite video game?

Borderlands.

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Game jokes
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I’ve been looking for my ex girlfriend’s killer for the past two years. But no one would do it.

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Woman jokes
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Me:Have you seen a mr.weewoo Most people:no Me: he drives the ambulance down stairs

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Stairs jokes
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Whats the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? – The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

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What’s the difference?
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My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.

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Waiting jokes

Woman one: I got so mad at my GPS today that I told it to go to hell! Woman two: Did that work? Woman one: Well, it took me to my in-laws’ house.

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Woman jokes
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Whats the difference between a white kid and a computer?

The child has no trouble shooting

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Computer jokes
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What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?

A baby with burst armbands

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Green jokes
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What game does an emo love

Hang man

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Game jokes
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%%Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We’ve known each other for so long Your heart’s been aching, but You’re too shy to say it Inside, we both know what’s been going on We know the game and we’re gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. mucho_mango: just woke up from my dream what was that.

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Game jokes
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