Transport jokes

To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

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Why did the child drop their icecream They got hit by a bus

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Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question. Johnny:What? Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty? Johnny: Yes ofc jesus mad everbody wonderfully! Ex: Awhh! Johnny: But who ever made you was painting tomas the train while making your face.

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Chuck Norris trained dude perfect how to do it

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The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.

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My ex girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus drivers licence.

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Two boys are talking on the bus Boy 1: I feel like i’m forgetting something. Boy 2: hey did you hear about that school shooting last week? Boy 1: oh that’s right

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The 1645 service has been cancelled and has been replaced by a replacement bus service. EasyJet would like to apologise to all of those who are travelling to Greece.

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hey look its that TRAINS gender guy he says i like trains uh o

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Why didn’t Sally get home from work. She got hit by a bus

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Did you hear about the Mexican train hijacker? They say he had locomotives.

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1:My grandpa died last year 2:What kind of cancer? 1:He was hit by a bus! its called bus cancer

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When they where going around giving out brains and U thought they where saying train so u said no thanx I’ll take the next one ????

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A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. “Well,” says the bus driver, “every night at 8 o’clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I’m sure you could convince her to have sex with you.” The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her. “Oh, God!” she exclaims. “Take me with you!” The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they’re getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it’s over, the man pulls off his God disguise. “Ha, ha! I’m the man from the bus! ” “Ha, ha!” says the nun, removing her costume. “I’m the bus driver!”

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Why did the strawberry ?? go out with a banana? Because it could not find a date

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